Well, during my voice lesson I got a text from a good friend telling me that he was at his audition and there were lots of 'Colleen Wannabee's' in there and I should get my butt in that room! I was excited, but hesitant. I asked every question I could possibly ask in hopes of finding some reason not to go:
'Do they have you in their system?'
"No, you just sign in when you walk in the door."
'Do you think it'll be less of a wait if I go later, towards the end of the day?'
"I think it'll be about the same wait no matter when you go."
'Do I need sides? What is everyone wearing? Why would I be good enough? Would I get arrested if they found me out? Will I get blacklisted? Punched? Murdered???!?!?!?!'
Shhh....I had to tell myself to stop the doubt. Stop telling yourself you're not good enough. You're friend, your supporter, wouldn't put you in a position of making a fool of yourself. He's helping you! Let him!
So, after about an hour of working up the nerve, I saddled on some balls (excuse my french) and marched into that audition waiting room, headshot in hand, confidence rising and feeling hella good about my decision to be bold, brave and ambitious. Fearless. Daring. Go out and grab your dreams!
I stepped into the room and eek...there was a lady checking everyone in with a list in hand with everyone's headshot and info on it. Now, there was someone in front of me, so I waited patiently, thinking, 'Should I give up now? Accept defeat? Or stand here and show everyone that I do in fact belong in this room?'
I held my ground.
I overheard the guy in front of me, who happened to also not be on the list, (a fellow crasher?) and I listened to his confident reply of, 'Well, I received the audition this morning, so it was a late confirmation and I'm not even supposed to be here until 5pm, but I thought I'd try to come early.'
Why thank you sir for your brilliant B.S. When my turn came up I casually said, 'I just overheard what you two were saying and I think I probably have the same issue since I got the notification this morning from my agent and confirmed just a few hours ago.'
The woman smiled and said, "Ok, whats your name? Let me see if I can find you!"
Knowing she wouldn't find me, I confidently stated my name and watched as she searched. She kindly told all of us 'missing' people to hang out until she talked to the director to find out if he could squeeze us in. At least I wasn't the only one! *Phew!
After about a five min. wait, she announced that we could stay if we were male and bilingual. Guess all the balls in the world couldn't have gotten me in that door. But you know what? At least I tried!
And for that I'm proud of myself and have no regrets. I also got to leave my headshot, because she so graciously offered to collect them, saying, 'We're casting things all the time so if you want to leave your headshots I'll gladly take them.' Why not?
Have you ever crashed an event you weren't supposed to go to? It's a pretty good adrenaline rush! Thanks Universe for giving me some excitement. Now, can I please get a kick-a** lead in an action movie and a paycheck that makes me faint??